Awesome Movie

Absolutely the worst movie.

It was OK. I don't see why everyone loves it so much. It wasn't very smart or deep or well-directed.

Ok... Let's be honest. It cannot be the best movie but is quite enjoyable. The movie has the potential to develop a great plot for future movies

"The Tongan Ninja," is a low budget parody of 70's and 80's martial arts films from Asia. The clearest comparison is with "Kung Pow! Enter the Fist," a film released slightly earlier in the same year. Both of these films are send ups of the various clichés and gaffs typical to kung fu and ninja films. TN distinguishes itself not in quality of SFX or novelty; rather, TN stands out because it exudes a sense of joy and enjoyment that the film makers had. The title of this film is an immediate clue to the overall theme and technical quality of the film. What sets this entry into the parody genre apart is the way in which it was executed.As with all parody, this film assumes that the audience will find mockery of details funny. TN pays very close attention to the slipshod practices of previous martial arts film makers. The result of this attention is a film that lambastes dubbing, poor writing, awkward/unrealistic romance, and absurd plot devices. The effect is very amusing. Unlike films that attempt to fill 90 minutes with as many gags and jokes as possible, TN remains consistent with the gaffs that it parodies. By limiting the extent of mockery, TN allows itself to develop an actual alternate world which is populated by naïve, stupid, and very funny people. A second, and more risky assumption, is that an "action" film can be successful if dialog driven. This does seem a contradiction in terms. How is it that a film, one which relies on fight scenes and mortal combat, can rely on so much exposition and dialog? The movie answers this by providing over the top silly dialog that touches on every oddity found in Martial Arts film dubs. Repetition, awkward translations of common "Asian" sayings, ridiculously misplaced commentary, and colorful threats all blend together to create a truly hilarious experience.TN is not without faults. The reliance on dialog does lead the story to drag at points. In addition, the repetition is just that, repetitive. However, these problems are easily forgiven when one actually feels this movie. To clarify the last sentence, this film conveys the joy and fun of the film makers. Possibly an example will help. We have all seen the uninspired formulaic film which is clearly made in an attempt to tidy up budgets and possibly make a small profit. These films are by no means "bad," yet they lack the ethereal quality of "Fun." TN exudes a sense of enjoyment. It is quite palpable how this production was relished by all involved. As the audience looses themselves in this happy mood, the film becomes all the more enjoyable.On a personal note, I will be highly recommending "The Tongan Ninja," to friends. This is perfect movie night fare. The lovingly crafted crappiness makes a wonderful pairing with beer and greasy food. 6 of 10 stars.

Watching Tongan Ninja is like watching a movie so deliberately bad, it's good! Which is not surprising, given that the creative brains of Jemaine Clement and Bret McKenzie behind Flight of the Conchords, had a hand in crafting the zany scenes, crazy dialogue and mind- boggling tongue in cheek action sequences. It's like watching a kid's cartoon come alive, though it comes with a tinge of unexpected violence as well to make it more adult.The basic structure follows that of Bruce Lee's Way/Return of the Dragon, where a martial arts practitioner get sent to protect a restaurant from thugs who come asking for protection money. Sam Manu plays Sione Finau aka Tongan Ninja the titular character, whose tragic background of his father being killed by a fish haunts him into adulthood. Growing up in a Pacific island where he learns his ninja skills, he gets sent by his master to New Zealand to help a friend in need, represented by Miss Lee (Linda Tseng) whom he falls in love with.You know it's gonna be mindless fun with slapstick humour when the villains are caricatures such as Kinfe Man, Gun Man and his arch-nemesis Action Man (played by Jemaine Clement himself) with whom is under the same ninja tutelage. The fights don't take themselves seriously, as it really hammed up every cliché you can find in bad action movies. From funny character names to funny action moves coupled with cheesily bad special effects, everyone's acting is really over the top, and therein lies the fun factor when watching the movie, complete with spaghetti western styled dialogue and dubbed voices that are never in sync.What also worked here are the zany song and dance sequences, which acted as a precursor of the later collaboration between Clement and McKenzie. In fact, if you pay attention to the lyrics that are sung during these sequences, that's half the fun already as you're likely to have been chuckling along.So don't expect quality production values with polished acting. You can tell these folks had a lot of fun spoofing the genre and probably had a great time on set, and this shows up in the product in all honesty. It doesn't bite off more than it can chew, and provides for some really enjoyable entertainment.

Although somewhat of a bargain basement film (I picked it up for £2.99!) it seems I found an undiscovered gem! Although I was dubious in the first scene about whether I would find it funny, it soon got into the swing of things and was an absolute laugh riot, as well as a lovingly written nod to the old 70's martial arts dubs and other films such as Karate Kid (The restaurant workers claim to train at the Larusso Dojo) and possibly the Steven Chow films (The end fight is very Shaolin Soccer) A lot of the film bafflingly silly, but not unenjoyably so. The impromptu dance routines, Jermaine-covered pop songs and insane characters such as Knife Man (Who fights with kitchen knives) and Gun Man (a 'Leon'-esque character who couldn't hit a barn door) just add to the bizarreness of the film. Even better is the way the bad guys are introduced, in a computer game style reminiscent of Mortal Kombat. Showing their fighting stats underneath, the characters are shown in the screen in the corner posing with their weapons amid scantily clad dancing women. Although the humour is quite in your face and the action is mainly slapstick, purposely bad effects, dubbing akin to 'Hercules Returns', and not much budget just make it funnier. Absolutely fantastic!

I just saw this movie on DVD. It was truly, truly awful. I tried to like it.Yes, I understood it was a spoof, but really, it was appalling. The jokes fell flat. The dubbing which at first was amusing, became very irritating.I couldn't see what market the film was aimed at. No matter which one it was, I feel it missed on all points.For no reason, there was at least one brief musical scene (when Chef Guy thinks Sione is a restaurant customer) that just further detracted from the plot line. I don't remember any musical scenes in any Bruce Lee movies.The only amusing bits on the DVD were the extras.The Beat Girls performing at the Bar in the club scene was one of the very very few highlights.Don't waste your time unless you're a kiwi who likes early Bruce Lee movies.