The Worst Film Ever

Sorry, this movie sucks

I cannot think of one single thing that I would change about this film. The acting is incomparable, the directing deft, and the writing poignantly brilliant.

By the time the dramatic fireworks start popping off, each one feels earned.

And, we have it, right here… a low budget Indiana Jones rip-off. Mark Roper is a director of low budget action films, but all of a sudden he wanted to direct some adventure film that resembles Indiana Jones. And guess what? He didn't make it. The filming locations, the ambient of the movie, the atmosphere, the sense that something adventurous is going to happen… is weak. It's just a low budget action film, masked into a cliché adventure film, starring Thomas Ian Griffith, who starred in most low budget, action-martial arts films. Griffith, being a martial artist, good one to say, and also a good, classically trained actor, I watched this film because of him, he was OK, in whatever he do, he is good, he gives us a solid performances, but his looks and martial arts knowledge always leads him to C crap, action movies. Griffith plays Chris Quartermain, the grandson of the great fictional adventurer Allan Quartermain… how odd is that? Well, they needed some famous character to attract adventure movie fans. Weak script, weak story, nothing's that special, not even the comic element which is pretty much around. The other actors did as much as they could with their performances, but not good enough… that actress that played a leading villain Karol Lorenzo, man, she was irritating… bad acting, and no charisma at all. He also have Gotz Otto here, he is known from "Tomorrow Never Dies" and "Beowulf" (1999), and by his appearance here, I knew that him and Griffith would have a fight scene. They are both tall and lean and they seem evenly match. Predictable… So as the rest of the movie… avoid it… if you want to put yourself to sleep.

When judging a product like this one must take into account where and for whom it was made. This is a typical European adventure flick meant to be seen by the whole family on a weekend outing. This implies it is pretty bloodless, the violence is theatrical and the dialogue is non-shocking. But unlike comparable American B-products, like The Librarian, it is a little more realistic and relies much less on effect. For instance in this film people from different countries all speak different languages and vehicles do not explode when driven over a cliff. There is the stereotypical old legend, but at least there is no magical mystery involved. Apart from that the film clearly has difficulty choosing between a historic or a modern setting and moves back and forth from a costume exposé on the Orient express to using a laptop to solve clues of the riddle to being chased by sword-wielding clansmen on horseback, etc. (The story would have worked much better if it had been set entirely in the interbellum period when the region was in upheaval). The acting is rather overdone in places, as in the roguish boyishness of the protagonist, or the mysteriousness of the blue rider and the love interest is too stuck in sulking mode to display any love chemistry. Still, it was not a bad film,... if it had been released in the 1960s!

In the year 2001, the cowboy bankers park their horses in front of their corporate huts at Wall Street while spitting the tobacco they chew... Well, weird? So is police wearing fez and horsemen chasing trucks with swords in Turkey. This is not fantasy, just ignorance. The Cinematography also sucks; cheap and overdone (Camera rotates around the actress ten times to create effect of nobody knows while the actress giving comments of no importance). Too many clichés, predictable story line,terrible casting. Almost every detail in the movie may make you wonder if these producers ever leave their countries for a short holiday or business; or, more important, if they ever worry about the quality of the film they make...

"High Adventure" stars Vampires' Thomas Ian Griffith as gambler and adventurer Chris Quatermain. His last name may sound very familiar to Allan Quatermain. He's his grandson just like Griffith explains in the movie. "High Adventure" is suppose to be an action/adventure movie but lacks of originality because of a small budget. Griffith travels to Africa to recover Alexander the Great's treasure hidden somewhere in cave. His trusty assistant Johnny Ford (Harry Peacock) and his love interest (Anja Kling), have to join forces to find the treasure before ruthless gangster Lorenzo gets her hands on it. Bad action, quite long even though it only lasts 94 minutes and no cool scenes. The only good thing might be Thomas Ian Griffith's grade-B performance when he pulls off funny one liners like (a man just saved his life) "We owe him a beer !" and (a woman kisses him when he's got a fake mustache on) "You should try without the silly mustache." Overall, I think it's more of a lightweight comedy with a little bit of action from martial arts master Thomas Ian Griffith. I rate this movie 5/10.