Simply Perfect

How sad is this?

This is a coming of age storyline that you've seen in one form or another for decades. It takes a truly unique voice to make yet another one worth watching.

One of the worst ways to make a cult movie is to set out to make a cult movie.

WWE was so excited about Wrestlemania XXI that it almost forgot about No Way Out. Only 3 matches were announced prior to the PPV and most matches were made on Sunday Night Heat. What's more, WWE had to give away thousands of free tickets to fans. In all 8000 fans watched No Way Out.Results for the show: Rey Mysterio and Eddie Guerrero defeated The Basham Brothers in a fair match to win the WWE tag straps.Booker T defeated John Heidenreich in a terrible brawl. No one cared when he smashed Booker with a chair shot but who would.The Undertaker pinned Luther Reigns. It just seemed to pad the event out.Chavo Guerrero won a Cruiserweight Battle Royal to capture the Cruiserweight championship. This was only 9 minutes and 45 seconds long so it didn't stand a chance.John Cena beat Kurt Angle in a very good match. Yes Cena was in a good match for once. That would mean that Cena had the chance to face JBL for the title at Wrestlemania XXI.The main event saw JBL put his title on the line against Big Show. No one cared, everybody wanted to see the barbed wire around the steel cage get used, it did but only once. The finish was better than the match. Show chokeslammed JBL off the cage and Show hit the ground in which he thought he won the title, but no. JBL made the ring collapse and he snuck through it and he got to the floor first. Amazing eh? Afterwards Batista came out and totally destroyed The Basham Brothers and JBL.Overall Grade - C

The No Way Out card looked like a lot of what we've been getting from WWE pay-per-views in recent months. A few good matches, a few bad matches, and of course some random non-wrestling stuff.Match 1: Bashams vs. Eddie & Rey. WWE Tag Team Championship.An expected opener. Fast-paced but few highlights. Bashams in control for most of the time but their offense isn't too exiting. Rey plays the peril face and dodges away from the heels in a hilarious spot. Eddie picks up the pinfall victory when he hits one of the Bashams with the belt. Clearly better than the Rey/RVD vs. Kenzo/Dupree matches. Sadly I think this title win will be a cheap excuse for giving Rey and Eddie something to do at WrestleMania.Match Rating: 3/5 Dawn Marie and Torrie join the announcers booth for the first part of the Diva Rookie Contest. I need to get some coffee…Match 2: Booker T vs. Heidenreich Simple maths folks; Heidenreich + Poems = Me switching the channel. I knew I was going to need the coffee for something and indeed I did. Very uninspiring bout that has been rushed into the card. Heidenreich hits a scoop slam, which is as much technical wrestling as we've seen from this man since he debuted. Match ends in a disqualification after seven minutes. Highlights: none.Match Rating: 1/5 Match 3: 6 Man Cruiserweight Elimination.Disappointing! Being an elimination match, it meant that we were in for five singles matches. And let me tell you, singles matches that end in two minutes can do nothing but harm to the wrestlers and the division, not to mention the match itself. No time for the action to build up, we get five finishes in ten minutes. And what finishes! Screwjobs, roll-ups and an incorrect referee decision! Paul London basically saves the match on his own with some highly impressive spots, but eventually has to sell a weak finish when Chavo uses the ropes to get the pin and the title. The only good thing about this is that it increases the chances of a singles match (London vs. Chavo) at WrestleMania.Match Rating: 2/5 Diva crap part 2. My cat walks into the room and yawns.Match 4: Undertaker vs. Luther Reigns Another big men match, as we haven't had enough of them already. Reigns' selling is simply not good enough. Undertaker's current character is a mish-mash of his past gimmicks that doesn't make any sense at all. He is a routine man and works the same matches over and over again: Dominates the beginning with crappy moves like "old school", where he goes to the top rope while his opponent is just standing there in amazement. Slow-paced action follows before he kicks out of the opponents finisher and tombstones his way to another victory. While this match is far from terrible, I doubt anyone will remember it in a month. Painfully average, just like everything else involving UnderBiker the last two years.Match Rating: 2/5 The divas once again head towards the ring for what is (thankfully) the final part of the contest. But the one who decided that this debacle should waste away 15 minutes needs to be fired.Match 5: Cena vs. Angle. #1 Contenders.Now onto something better! An intense match with psychology, strategy and a clean finish. Angle is his usual crisp self while Cena steps up at least one level and varies his offense more than ever before. Angle tries to wear down the less experienced Cena. He kicks out of the FU and goes for the ankle. Cena escapes the Ankle Lock two times by reaching the ropes which frustrates Angle. Angle picks up Cena's chain but Cena overwhelms him and hits the FU a second time for the pinfall victory. Cena looks suddenly much more believable as #1 contender!Match Rating: 4/5 Match 6: JBL vs. Big Show. Barbed Wire Steel Cage.Pretty good stuff here. Some brawling, some power moves. A little slow perhaps, but still an enjoyable contest. The barbed wire doesn't really come into play at all though. I wondered how they would book the finish. I knew Bradshaw was going to retain but since they have built up Big Show as an unstoppable monster it would be ridiculous to have him to do a pinfall job only one month prior to WrestleMania. After 12 minutes, Big Show Chokeslams JBL through the ring and then escapes the cage via the door after breaking the lock. As a columnist noted; even though Show seemed to be the winner at that time, the crowd was dead silent. No matter how good the booking was, the audience could not be fooled: Everyone knew Bradshaw was going to retain.Match Rating: 3/5 The Good: Angle/Cena was by far the match of the night. The tag match and the main event were solid and entertaining. The WrestleMania promos were funny.The Bad: It bugs me is that the awful Diva Contest so obviously stole the time from the cruiserweights. The priorities were not correct here, to say the least!! The Ugly: Rochelle's joke. And if the Booker/Heidenreich feud drags into WrestleMania I am going to scream.A side note: Batista's involvement hints that we may see a Triple Threat for WrestleMania. Though I've heard that this has got negative reactions from the fans. Well, of course! They have hyped up the Evolution split-up storyline so much that HHH and Batista can put on a headlock derby for 30 seconds and it will be called a classic. And now they're just going to drop it? If this is set up just to have Trips retaining at WrestleMania, it is going to suck! No Way Out Rating: 2/5

Spoilers Ahead:Truthfully i wasn't expecting anything extraordinary in this event and i didn't really get that but nonetheless this ppv was not bad. 1) The opener was Eddie Guerrero and Rey Mysterio vs the Bashams (C) For the Tag team titles. I'm no huge fan of the Bashams and I am sure that not many people are either. This was a typical tag match in which the heels dominate thoroughly through out the long mid-match and the faces will eventually gain some momentum and make that long awaited tag. The Bashams bore me to death with long submission holds. Thankfully the deserving Eddie and Rey won and perhaps heading into Wrestlemania 21 with those belts. A good opener in total and this got the fans into a good mood starting the event with the popular guys going over.Match Rating: 6/10Then There is 3 rounds of the rookie diva contests. I'm not going to really say much about it because in my eyes it can be a bit of a time waster. But i guess some fans enjoy that sort of material. However some laughs were provided for example them massaging each other and even a body slam.2) Booker T vs Heidenreich Not a good match worst on the card to be honest. Booker had to carry Heidenreich to a below watchable match. I swear Heidenreich has become a jobber since coming into the WWE losing to the Undertaker on countless occasions. Heidenreich purposely gets himself disqualified by smacking booker in the throat with a steel chair. I really hope that they do not try to continue this feud. Match Rating: 3/103)Elimination 6 man Cruiserweight Championship (Funaki(c) vs Paul London vs Chavo Guerrero vs Shannon Moore vs Akio vs Spike Dudley) The Cruiserweights should be given more time i say. The fans were not really into this match at all except during the dangerous spots example the 450 splash by London. This match was really short and i was hoping for London to win. Chavo won, which I'm not complaining about because he is good, but London deserves it more. Hopefully his win will come at Mania. Match Rating: 6/104) Undertaker vs Luther Reigns Not that bad, not that good. Both men put on a good offensive moves and had their time controlling the match. I have one thing to say Undertaker you need to lose a bit more often it is getting too predictable with you winning every time. I like Luther Reigns though he is good for a big man and if the WWE use him wisely he may be able to go far. Match rating: 5/105)Number one contender-ship for the WWE title at Mania Kurt Angle vs John Cena. A tad predictable but one of the best Cena Mathces i have seen ever. I guess Angle can carry anyone to a good match. Angle needs one more title reign before his neck ends his career. Cena is so over with the fans it was unbelievable even in Angles Home town of Pittsburgh. Match Rating: 7/106) WWE championship match (Steel cage barb Wire match) JBL vs the Big Show. The first ever Barbed Wire Steel cage match in the WWE. Not the greatest technical match ever. But i am sure that everyone is all for JBL losing the title to anyone. He has had it for 9 months or so now and it is getting boring. Somehow he always manages to prevail against all the odds stacked against him. I'm pretty sure that everyone including me thought the Big Show had won this time when he stepped out of the cage. Sadly JBL had crawled under the ring just before him though, after a devastating choke slam through the ring. Looks like it will be Cena vs JBL for the title at Wrestlemania. Match Rating: 6.5/10This PPV ina ll i would rate a C-

no way out was a pretty good event. some of the matches were good, some were bad. here are the matches: 1. Eddie and Rey vs. the Bashams (c) for WWE Tag Titles: Great opening match! Eddie and Rey make a great tag team. Winners and NEW tag team champions, EDDIE AND REY! 4/5 2. Rookie Diva- Evening Gown Competition: Joy vs. Michelle vs. Lauren vs. Rochelle. What the hell is this!? This is horrible. No wonder WWE is failing. Everybody looked bad in their gowns. No rating 3. Booker T vs. Heidenreich: BAD BAD match! Horrible booking, horrible match. Winner- Booker T by DQ. 1/5 4. 6-Way Cruiserweight Title: Funaki (c) vs. Paul London vs. Akio vs. Shannon Moore vs. Spike Dudley vs. Chavo Guerrero. Not bad, but not good. Short match. I wanted London to win. Winner and NEW Cruiserweight champion, Chavo Guererro! 3/5 5. Rookie Diva- Talent Competition: Joy vs. Michelle vs. Lauren vs. Rochelle: Joy gave Torrie a massage. Rochelle told the worst joke i have ever heard. Here it is: How do you get a Klenex (sp?) tissue to dance? You put a little boogie in it. Crowd boos. Lauren did the worst dance. Michelle gave Dawn Marie a bodyslam. Dear lord. This is crap. No rating 6. Undertaker vs. Luther Reigns: Pretty good match. Surprised to see Undertaker having a good match. Luther was pretty impressive. Winner-Undertaker. 3/5 7. Rookie Diva- Bikini Contest: Actually, i kinda liked this round. Joy looked hot! Winner of the Rookie Diva 2005, JOY! 1/5 cause Joy looked hot! 8. #1 Contender Tournament Finals- Kurt Angle vs. John Cena: The best match of the night. They gave their hardest to go to Wrestlemania. I was disappointed that Shawn Michaels didn't come to cost Angle the match and the shot at Wrestlemania. Winner- John Cena. 4/5 9. Barbed Wire Steel Cage WWE Title- JBL (c) vs. Big Show: Good match. Bloody battle. JBL ckokeslammed through the ring. That was AWESOME! Big Show broke the lock and went through the door. Big Show wins! But wait. JBL retains his title because JBL crawled under the ring to the outside when he was chokeslammed. Big Show tosses JBL back in the ring, and the Cabinet comes and goes after Big Show. Batista comes and destroys the Cabinet. JBL is crawling away when John Cena comes out and spinebusters JBL in some junk. Good match. Winner and STILL WWE champion, JBL! 4/5The Good- The opening and main event matches were good. Angle/Cena was the match of the night.The Bad- Rookie Diva segments were horrible! Booker/Heidenreich was a horrible match! Overall, No Way Out was a good event. 3/5