Yo, there's no way for me to review this film without saying, take your *insert ethnicity + "ass" here* to see this film,like now. You have to see it in order to know what you're really messing with.

A great movie, one of the best of this year. There was a bit of confusion at one point in the plot, but nothing serious.

The plot isn't so bad, but the pace of storytelling is too slow which makes people bored. Certain moments are so obvious and unnecessary for the main plot. I would've fast-forwarded those moments if it was an online streaming. The ending looks like implying a sequel, not sure if this movie will get one

All of these films share one commonality, that being a kind of emotional center that humanizes a cast of monsters.

Crash of Moons isn't really a movie - it's several episodes of the Rocky Jones: Space Ranger series cobbled together into 78 minutes. As the title implies, there are two moons set to crash into each other. The crash will destroy both worlds and their citizens. One planet is friendly and open to evacuation. The other is hostile and doesn't believe Rocky and Co. Can they get everyone off in time?Crash of Moons is harmless enough, but it's not very good. I'm sure that had I been 7 in 1954, I would have eaten this up. I can just imagine the exploits of Rocky Jones thrilling kids of the 50s. Today, it's all so quaint. The special effects are as naive as you'd expect. The acting is hammy. The comedy relief is corny. And the male chauvinism is thick. Still, the idea of two worlds colliding is an interesting one and held my interest throughout most of the runtime. Like I said, it's all harmless enough, just not anything special.One thing I really enjoyed was seeing a younger John Banner. I'm an unashamed fan of Hogan Heroes. I think it's one of the best 30 minute comedies to ever air. I always enjoy seeing Hogan alumni in other settings, whether it's Werner Klemperer, Bob Crane, or Leon Askin (who is in a bunch of stuff). But Banner holds a special place in all Hogan fans' hearts.

A couple of inhabited planets are on a collision course. The space federation called the United Worlds warns the rulers of both planets of the deadly situation. The problem is that the ruler of one of the planets, Ophesius, is an evil queen who wants nothing to do with the United Worlds. When she finally accepts the situation, rather than organise a mass evacuation she decides to simply blow the other planet up.This was made up into a feature film by merging a few episodes of the Rocky Jones Space Ranger TV series together. Like a lot of sci-fi films of the 50's it has cold war undertones. The planet Ophesius represent communist thinking in the way that they refuse to join up with everybody else and are only interested in themselves. Well, more accurately, this is how Americans in the 50's mostly thought of communists, as opposed to any particular accuracy of depiction. Whatever the case, you don't need to know this and the film works as a space adventure. Personally I found it interminable but others with a keen interest in 50's sci-fi may well completely disagree. But I think this one is even going to try their patience somewhat.

Take your best shot at "Crash of Moons", but I found the film to be fairly entertaining, with some unique story elements and special effects that come off as pretty original for the mid 1950's. I've been overdosing on sci-fi films of the era recently, and must say that it's a lot better than some of the space turkeys that came out a decade later, like "Voyage To The Prehistoric Planet" and "Zontar The Thing From Venus". Part of it's appeal for me included the well done orbiting space station OW-9, and the use of creative space jargon to describe futuristic technology like the 'viseograph', the 'astrophone' and 'tortanic' missiles.The hero of the piece is Space Ranger Rocky Jones (Richard Crane), the movie spliced together from episodes of the mid '50's television program. It's not hard to see where some of the imagination for Star Trek's Captain Kirk came from. Confident and take charge, Rocky seemed to be wherever the ladies were present, though without Kirk's overworked libido. His team includes the leggy Vena Ray, adequately portrayed by Sally Mansfield.The story line is also fairly imaginative, with two gypsy moons linked together by an atmosphere chain that initially threatens the space station, and then takes up an orbit that may destroy another planet. Ophecious is ruled by a hawkish space queen named Cleolanta (Patsy Parsons), who views the threat of rogue moon Placida as a United Worlds plot to destroy her planet and her rule.If you're a fan of 'B' Westerns, you'll have no trouble recognizing a couple of faces that made dozens of cowboy flicks each. Harry Lauter is Cleolanta's right hand man Atlasan, while her lieutenant is veteran Lane Bradford. Nan Leslie, who also made her mark in a fair number of Western films, is Atlasan's wife Trinka, the voice of reason on Ophecious who is anxious to accept Rocky Jones' help to save her planet's people. Meeting her prompts Rocky's sidekick Winky (Scotty Beckett) to remark - "Hey Rocky, who is that luscious trail of star dust anyway?" Perhaps the surprise member of the cast for trivia fans is the character Bavarro, who a dozen years later would become the perfect foil for Colonel Hogan on the popular series "Hogan's Heroes". I didn't make the connection at first, but will have to go back to review John Banner's scenes to measure the resemblance.OK, it's dated, black and white, and has moments when the non action simply plods along, but overall I found "Crash of Moons" to be likable enough. It helps that the players themselves didn't seem to take the whole thing too seriously, as they looked to be in the spirit of things, all with a straight face. I wonder how much practice that took, as some of those space uniforms looked downright out of this world in a genuinely 'out there' sort of way.

Crash of Moons isn't half bad. Considering that it was an MST experiment, you're tendency is to brace for the worst, especially considering it falls into that dreaded 50s-era space movie.The plot is quite evident and the characters are engaging. Rocky Jones is a take-charge, aggressive, and well-meaning character who made James T. Kirk possible a generation later. Miss Ray, whose mini-skirted character is constrained by 1950s perception of women, comes off well. Despite her character being rather hamstrung, she manages to breathe life into the role and lessens the effect. "Winky", on the other hand, is an annoying character who would have been the first to die had he been in either a 80s slasher flick or the original Star Trek series.Be willing to suspend your disbelieve with respect to the scientific end of the story. But don't let that get in the way of enjoying a good rainy Saturday afternoon movie.Sterno says sign up for a mission with Rocky Jones.