Two Bits & Pepper

January. 01,1995      PG
Rating:
4
Trailer Synopsis Cast

Comedy about idiotic (the two can't even add 1+1) kidnappers, both played for unknown reasons by Joe Piscopo, who capture two young girls and hold them for ransom. However, in "Home Alone" fashion, the two girls make fools of the two men. The film becomes even sillier as two horses who talk to one another decide to rescue the girls from the kidnappers

Joe Piscopo as  Zike / Spider
Dennis Weaver as  Sheriff Pratt
Rachel Crane as  Katie
Perry Stephens as  Roger

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Reviews

Hellen
1995/01/01

I like the storyline of this show,it attract me so much

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Artivels
1995/01/02

Undescribable Perfection

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Jeanskynebu
1995/01/03

the audience applauded

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Ceticultsot
1995/01/04

Beautiful, moving film.

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mikelippenkrantz
1995/01/05

I'm a fan of "Mystery Science Theater 3000," so I've willingly sat through some of the worst films ever made. But when it comes to children's entertainment, it doesn't get more bottom-of-the-barrel than this little disasterpiece. Normally, there wouldn't be any need to write a review about movies like this. This movie disappeared into a well-deserved obscurity. But now I find it in 10 movie children's film DVD packs available for $5 at Wal-Mart. So some unsuspecting parent will stumble upon this film, think it a harmless piece of entertainment for the kids, and then proceed to traumatize their children for life with a story about bratty girls, creepy, repulsive, yet idiotic kidnappers, a dream sequence about a horse getting killed, a reference to white slavery (I'm not kidding), and a wonderfully bloody scene of a horse on an operating table after getting shot. Please...if you love your children...avoid this film. It's not for kids. It's not for ANYONE.

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jowhite-5
1995/01/06

Joe Piscopo delivered a fairly good performance, although "Zike" was a shade too contrived. He can do better. By far he was the best actor - everyone else was either wooden, too stage-y, or couldn't deliver their lines with appropriate intonation or emotion. The script left a lot to be desired. Why would the mom not think to look for her daughter in her horse's barn? Why would a girl run off without her horse (DUH - teen girls and horses, ya know - LOL!)? Most disturbing - why would a movie show a little girl chatting with and exchanging insults with two men who have just invited her into their car? She wouldn't have gotten away with that in real life.Oh well, we have a lot of fun with interpreting what the horses are really saying. Most of the time, they're asking, "Are you gonna give me that treat, or what?" The little horse tries to dominate the big horse in many of the scenes. Best of all, when one horse is supposed to be encouraging the other, he's doing the equine equivalent of flipping the bird! Park your brain at the door, but do pause and talk about things from time to time with your kids.I gave it three stars because of Joe Piscopo, and because I can think of movies that are a lot worse.

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spamqill
1995/01/07

Mind numbing would be a compliment for this film. Children's films should entertain kids and make them want to talk about the film, not what they're going to do after it's over.For anyone over age ten, this is insulting to the intelligence. Huge plot holes, kids behaving smarter than their age, and adults who are incapable of the obvious help you forget the insulting dialogue. I almost felt sorry for Dennis Weaver and Joe Piscopo being a part of this.I had to use this film on DVD with subtitles to teach English to my Japanese students; they were 11 and found this painful to watch. Clearly it's not for anyone smarter than "Zike" or "Spider".Exactly what was the point of the horse rustlers who never appear again? At least in Monty Python's "Life Of Brian", the UFO scene was put in for humour. And _do_ horse rustlers really exist in this day and age?

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nomad-10
1995/01/08

Nice little story about 2 girls and their horses. The horses talk to each other in the style of Homeward Bound or Look Who's Talking. Toss in two bumbling kidnappers (both played by Joe Piscopo) for some comic relief and we have a story with a little drama, comedy, parental conflict on the trials and tribulations of growing up. Although predictable, it is charming and will appeal to little girls everywhere.

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