Just perfect...

Good movie but grossly overrated

It's entirely possible that sending the audience out feeling lousy was intentional

The best films of this genre always show a path and provide a takeaway for being a better person.

An amusing parody of the legend and mythos the character of Flash Gordon with erotic modifications throughout the film, from phallic crafts, nomenclatures, to blatantly phallic weapons. I recall hearing about this movie once upon a time as I saw it advertised on a billboard and wanted to see it then, and did not let a little thing like 'cronology' stop Me; but it was not until now when a VHS tape was recently excavated during the Lair relocation that I became reminded of its existence, and decided I had to watch and review it.A mysterious "Sex Ray" bombards earth, causing those subjected to be overtaken in orgiastic impulse, until it finally makes contact with an airplane carrying one "Flesh Gordon" {Jason Williams} and "Dale Ardor" {Suzanne Fields} who are also momentarily overwhelmed by its libidonous effects, until the plane is doomed to collision due to the preoccupation of all of the passengers inclusive of the pilot and crew; so he takes Dale in his arms and proceeds to parachute out into the cold night. As they descend, Dale, in a really bad platinum blonde wig, decides to perform fellatio on Flesh until culmination.When they finally land in an expanse of woodland, they are met by a "Dr. Jackoff", a scientist who has constructed a spacecraft, who proceeds to array Flesh and Dale with lurid conspiracy theories {ironically, he would have done well to guest on C2C!}. Eventually, he explains that he has traced the origin of the sex ray to a far off planet with the predictable name of "Porno", which is ruled by an "Emperor Wang" who wears far too much makeup - a planet dedicated to sensual indulgence {rather like The Rocky Horror Picture Show's "Transexual Transylvania"} which is made clearly evident by the majority of the main chamber floor occupied by nude nymphomaniacal lovers constantly undulating in Satantric bliss under the sovereign gaze of Wang, who eventually takes a liking to earth woman Dale Ardor, and plans to 'marry' her to the chagrin of Flesh Gordon, who causes a minor disruption therein, and is therefore at first condemned to immediate execution, but at the behest of The Princess who also happens to be a Sorceress, convinces Wang to "trial by ordeal", which involves a battle with feral cat women. Her desire is rewarded with a dream-like sexual sequence with the so-called "blonde giant" Gordon. They are eventually interrupted and attacked by Wang's forces, and escape to Arboria where they meet with a "Prince Precious", a gay Robin Hood-type with anthropic pretensions {the character actually reminds one of a hippie-Jesus in appearance, ideology, and mannerisms}, and teams up with Gordon and Jackoff to supplement their own rebel group. The only weapon which can counter the sex ray is the Sorceress' {who parishes in the confrontation} nipple pasties which Dr. Jackoff so gallantly applies to himself, lifting his shirt to prepare for battle. Wang whips out the heavy artillery with what he calls "rape robots" with drills for penises, which did inspire a chuckle or two.Dale Ardor is kidnapped by a group of amazonian lesbians and is subjected to their cunnilingual initiation rites until 'rescued' by the group, to which the lesbians release a locust-like creature {which later became known as a "penis fly trap"}. A quick mention is appropriate here of another subterranean monstrous denizen resembling a cyclopean basilisk-like penis {a "penisaurus", a-la the "one-eyed trouser snake" metaphor which blinks!} who earlier on attacked the trio as they made their way into the caves to escape Wang's effeminate guards sent out to retrieve them. In danger of The Palace being overthrown by the earthling interlopers, Wang descends into his own Ritual Chambre wherein resides a demonic statue which, like the Golem, comes to life at his beckoning, and therefore sets out to sexplore the kingdom {I thought it particularly humorous that this creature's voice and attitude resembles that of Barry White's}, and in a decidedly Kong-like manner, abducts Dale and takes her up with him atop "The Murder Tower", were the final conflict with Flesh and company occurs. Of particular note, a line spoken by Wang to the ungrateful invaders when admonished to remove the sex ray, was that he was doing them a favor, and I concur. The perfidious curse must be vanquished, that man's cities may truly become caves for the humanimal beasts of the field, that they may partake their fill without guilt or unreasonable restraint {as opposed to "responsible indulgence"}. And so let humanimals pleasure themselves in all manner of divine perversity - let indulgence reign supreme!Flesh Gordon received an "R" rating only because genital contact was not directly shown, otherwise, it surely had the potential to receive an X - XXX rating. Plenty of nudity to whet the pallet, but because of the "soft-porn" content, ends up more of an erotic "B-movie" with typical porno parody dialogue and amateur acting, which should have really gone into the actual sex acts, which could have made it a legendary pornographic film in the mode of the immortal Caligula, but instead is relegated to obscure B grade fare, although it still makes for naughty laughs and salacious comedy. I commend the Producers for at least "pushing the envelope", as it were, and expanding the erotic-artistic vision of the rating system, crossing the bridge from the off-white screen of the strictly pornographic genre into the silver screen of the cinema, thereby becoming "sinema", thus contributing to the incremental Return of Babylon.

A nice, light spoof of the old Flash Gordon serials combined with silly, soft porn. I think I saw this flick in drive-in theaters about six different times.You get to the point where you are lip-syncing all the words of Dr. Flexi Jerkoff and warning people to watch out for the Penisaurous's lurking outside the snack bar.The settings of the film were somewhat reminiscent of Jane Fonda's "Barbarella." The acting is "stiff" as it should be. Both for the serial plays and the soft porn. The dialog is clever without being pornographic. It would elicit the same "groaning" from teenage viewers as is heard when they watch the original "Reefer Madness" in modern day settings.

The beauty of Flesh Gordon is that it has no pretensions to seriousness. Much soft porn of the 70's was so mind-bogglingly asinine that lots of us nearly gave up sex. Flesh is so totally different, being funny, that it remains in my memory from the time I saw it in the Mid-70's. I still remember Dr Jerkoff unveiling his spaceship shaped like a giant erect phallus with the words "Fortunately I was able to complete the design before the Sex-ray took effect". The word 'Penisaurus' has passed into the vocabulary of Britain now, as an insult, obviously. The rapist robots with their little spring willys still linger in my memory. If I had seen it alone I would probably have walked out, but as a teenage miscreant with a friend it was hysterical. If you are not offended by the sight of breasts and enjoy a laugh watch it with some friends and a beer or two. Excellent fun.

Okay, so for this movie to be really funny there are one or two things that you need to consider before one can really enjoy it. First of all this is not a movie to be taken seriously. Obviously it was made at a time when special effects weren't that special so there are some scenes that are hilarious for that very reason. Also, the acting is completely over the top, which is fine considering that the whole plot is ridiculous and the writing is atrocious. But it is still great.I have to suggest that you watch this movie with a group of your close friends. If you have some people that can laugh at how insane this movie is, it makes 100 times better. Watching it alone you'll probably just shut it off before the sex rays even hit and you have to give it a chance after that.