Texas Across the River
October. 26,1966 NRThe Louisiana wedding of debutante Phoebe Ann Naylor to Don Andrea de Baldasar, El Duce de la Casala is stopped by the Cavalry over a matter of honor. Don Andrea flees across the river to Texas, where he meets up with Sam Hollis and his Indian sidekick, Kronk, who are carrying rifles to the town of Moccasin Flats. Don Andrea rescues an Indian maiden, Lonetta, tames some longhorns, competes with Sam for Phoebe's affections, eludes a Comanche war party and the cavalry and ultimately saves the town and gets his girl.
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Reviews
How sad is this?
Like the great film, it's made with a great deal of visible affection both in front of and behind the camera.
There are moments that feel comical, some horrific, and some downright inspiring but the tonal shifts hardly matter as the end results come to a film that's perfect for this time.
The film never slows down or bores, plunging from one harrowing sequence to the next.
I had forgotten how campy this movie was. The sound effects were really amusing. I saw this at the Houston Premiere in 1966 with my mom and aunt. Dean Martin was there in the movie theater. I guess I remember that more than the actual movie! LOL But it is really fun to watch on a lazy Saturday morning.
I had missed out on this when it was shown as a weekday matinée' on Italian TV ages ago; while not particularly outstanding, it's a thoroughly engaging (and attractively shot, mostly in exteriors) Western spoof with an amiable and willing cast led by Dean Martin (typically relaxed playing a Texan cattleman), Alain Delon (handsome and charming as a Spanish aristocrat), Rosemary Forsyth (her Southern belle is delightful), Tina Marquand (a cute Indian squaw) and Joey Bishop (in the role of Martin's wisecracking "Kronk" sidekick).Though the latter is nominally entrusted with carrying the film's comic relief, the other redskins ("Comanche") actually provide the funniest moments especially the antics of the chief's inept son (trying at one point to shoot a flaming arrow, he contrives to set his Dad's feathered cap on fire!). Also notable is a scene in which a medicine man alienated in tracking heroes' moves from afar bumps his head against a tree branch, not to mention the amusing charging command of the cavalry unit after Delon who's accused of murder which is so muddled that not even all the soldiers themselves are able to comprehend it! The film leads to a pretty good climax actually redolent of RED RIVER (1948) as Martin and Delon about to engage one another in duel can't even agree on whether to do it the official way (stand back to back, walk ten paces in opposite directions, then turn and shoot) or Western-style (face each other at opposite ends of the street, walk closer and then draw). However, the girls (Delon had been engaged to marry Forsyth but, in the meantime, she's caught Martin's attention which he tries to turn to his advantage by keeping his fever going, after being shot with an arrow, for three days straight while the Spaniard has Marquand, whom he has saved from certain death, gushing over him) have it out between themselves, though it's actually a ruse to put a stop to the intended showdown between their respective men. Delon is subsequently tried and convicted (with judge and defense counsel being the victim's brothers!), but Forsyth contrives to demonstrate how it was all an accident; to cap everything, oil is struck soon after while a grave is being dug for the aristocratic Spaniard! Curiously enough, just as SKIN GAME (1971) the comic Western I preceded this with the film features an incongruous but agreeable lounge score (by DeVol). In conclusion, another Dean Martin Western I own but have yet to watch also hinges on a dynamite star combo i.e. FIVE CARD STUD (1968) with Robert Mitchum as does, for that matter, ROUGH NIGHT IN JERICHO (1967; with George Peppard) which I might also be able to get my hands on in the not-so-distant future (for the record, I'm not familiar with this one either).
Hollywood discovered the not so subtle parody western in the mid-60's and produced several that have become true comedy classics; "Support Your Local Sheriff", "Cat Ballou", and "The Brothers O'Toole". Mel Brooks followed a few years later with "Blazing Saddles", the sub-genre's best ever. But for each one that has become a classic there are several best-forgotten releases that just didn't work. "Texas Across the River" (1966) is one of the better of these secondary efforts; not a total loss but far short of being the complete package.I wonder what goes through the mind of a relatively astute 21st century viewer when viewing something like "Texas Across the River" for the first time. My guess is that they would question the basic business sense of Hollywood producers (in not employing better writers) and wonder how anyone could have classified Joey Bishop as a comedian (he actually had his own prime time television comedy series). Dean Martin (with his basic "Matt Helm" personality) and French actor Alain Delon (it was all the rage for Hollywood to import the latest European heartthrob back then for this type of stuff-Delon was one of the few who have some degree of acting ability) are two parts of a love triangle. Rosemary Forsyth plays their romantic interest. She has very good chemistry with Martin and very little chemistry of any kind with Delon. Fortunately someone had the inspiration to import French actress Tina Aumont to play opposite Delon. She plays his secondary love interest, a beautiful Indian maiden, and their English challenged scenes together are far better because of the shared language challenge. "Texas Across the River" originally had a running length of 101 minutes and would have greatly benefited from some serious trimming. The running length was padded by old gags giving Jewish personality traits to the Indians. Unfortunately few (perhaps none) of this stuff is funny. Imagine the least funny10% of "F Troop's" Hekawi stuff endlessly strung together in the same movie.Forsyth is the main reason to watch "Texas Across the River". I for one have fallen in love with her Southern Belle character each time I've watched the movie, and it happened again during my last viewing. Definitely on my top 10 list of most pleasing movie heroines.Then again, what do I know? I'm only a child.
I remember seeing this the first time when I was about 12. I nearly passed out from laughing so hard. Maybe it's not highbrow comedy, but in my opinion, it's still one of the funniest movies ever made. I especially enjoy Joey Bishop's "Indian" character. Watch it with your kids.