Truly Dreadful Film

Fresh and Exciting

It's entirely possible that sending the audience out feeling lousy was intentional

This is a small, humorous movie in some ways, but it has a huge heart. What a nice experience.

Honestly, I can appreciate movies that are bad but still funny to watch, but this movie is honestly so bad that no amount of weed can make it fun. Every single aspect of this film is terrible. The story is hard to understand at all. The picture quality is again terrible. There are characters that are played by actors who look identical to each other, adding to the confusion even more. Seriously, I'm trying to do people a favour here by advising to avoid this utter rubbish. I bought it at cash converters for about one pound and I felt ripped off. It really is terrible. The only one thing I can think of about this film is that anyone with an interest in making music may wish to sample some of the lines, but Hextatic may have beaten you to that already.

I have seen way too many Joseph Lai/Godfrey Ho ninja movies, and most are completely unwatchable. About 1/10 may have something decent in it. Luckily, Ninja Terminator is one of those in the minority. The dialogue is so bad that it is actually good. It is laugh out loud funny at times, but I don't think it was supposed to be. If you can make it through a script that seems to have been written by a 5 year old, you may be able to make it through this. It doesn't help that this is 3 movies spliced together, and it doesn't make any sense. But if you love bad movies, you can't pass up this masterpiece of horrible cinema. In one scene, the bad guy uses a toy robot to send a message to Richard Harrison. The toy robot arrives with smoke and can talk. Godfrey Ho really wanted to show off his $5 budget. And if you like to see people kick a lot, you will get plenty of that. Jack Lam (named Jaguar Wong in the movie) and Hwang Jang Lee give great kicking displays. Hwang only participates in the final fight, but Jack Lam gets to show off his kicking skills throughout the entire movie.I have the Videoasia DVD and the picture quality is decent, and the English dubbing is classic. Sometimes a guy will have a redneck voice, and sometimes it will sound like a little kid. Fans of cheesy movies will love this Godfrey Ho classic. "I don't usually smoke this brand, but I'll do it for you."

An unbelievably daft effort from Godfrey Ho, the king of crap ninja movies, Ninja Terminator sees Ho's regular star Richard Harrison once again donning his natty camouflage suit to fight a variety of similarly garbed bad guys, all the while performing totally unnecessary cartwheels and back-flips.This time, Harrison plays Harry, one of a trio of good ninjas who steal a precious, magical golden statue from their evil boss. When one of the trio is killed and part of the statue is taken back, Harry enlists the help of his friend Jaguar Wong (who is a cool-as-ice, high-kicking bad-ass) to protect his dead friend's sister and try and retrieve the missing piece.Despite the story making little or no sense for most of the running time (which is what you get when you splice together footage from two different films, as is apparently the case here), Ninja Terminator is still well worth watching thanks to countless completely insane moments guaranteed to make you howl with laughter: watch in awe as Harry proves that no melon is a match for his ninja sword skills; be puzzled as a breakfast of live crabs suddenly turns nasty; wonder why the hell Hwang Jang Lee is wearing a bad blonde wig for most of the film; giggle uncontrollably as a toy robot menacingly delivers video tapes; and then check ebay to see if you too can get a cool Garfield phone like the one Harry uses.Amongst all this unexplainable, but very entertaining silliness, there are also plenty of pretty good martial arts fights (Jack Lam, as Jaguar Wong, is excellent and displays loads of decent moves before his inevitable battle against super-kicker Lee). Throw in a couple of gratuitous sex scenes, and some awful dialogue, and what you have is one hell of a fun film.

From the steamed crabs to explosive squash balls, diabolical dialogue to extraordinary wigs, death threat delivering toys to the most unsexy sex scenes ever, this has to be the very best cut and splice shitshower ever to grace the home video market. Bizarrely the soundtrack is genuinely good, as are some of the fight scenes.Take the following conversation between Jaguar Wong (yes, that's his name; the main baddie's called Tiger Chang) and Hapless Henchman 1, bearing in mind that the characters don't actually know each other - "Can I dying man have a last request? A cigarette?" "Well I doubt you'll contract lung cancer before I kill you, hahahahaha!" "I appreciate your concern for my wellbeing. Oh, and have one yourself... I'd hate for you to remember me as a mean son of a bitch." "Hmmm, I don't usually smoke this brand... but I'll do it for you." Watch this film.