hyped garbage

if their story seems completely bonkers, almost like a feverish work of fiction, you ain't heard nothing yet.

There's no way I can possibly love it entirely but I just think its ridiculously bad, but enjoyable at the same time.

The movie's not perfect, but it sticks the landing of its message. It was engaging - thrilling at times - and I personally thought it was a great time.

I have never seen anything like this. Why is this movie just going at it and trying to be all cutesy and trying to throw thrills or suspense at us? Was it trying to create precious memories for future nostalgia that only E.T. pulled off? There is nothing, and I mean nothing that I can get from this movie that makes me say, "Awwww" or "Gasp! Oh no!" All this can throw at you is pure confusion, hopelessness, and lifelessness throughout from frame to frame, beginning to end.Okay, try watching snot flow down a runny nose coming from an ugly alien. Does that sound endearing or cutesy? Or how about watching the same alien pull off a random dance routine with fog coming out of nowhere? Are you starting to like this movie now?The characters were lifeless (meaning poorly-acted). The only characters that were so alive were the talking animals! Yes, the animals! They put off a better performance than human beings! (It's funny that the movie doesn't even explain why they talk) But it doesn't stop there; the costumes for the aliens didn't even work! Nukie's blinking couldn't even match, and nor does his mouth move when he talks! Either way, if it was trying to stir my emotions to make me feel for any of the characters involved, it did not. This movie tugged not even one of my heartstrings. Every scene throughout this trash was pure torture, causing in me a desperate feeling of wanting it to be over so I can turn it off and watch or do something else. As much I love watching bad movies just for the fun of it, I couldn't with this. Not this.Now I know exactly why it's called "one of the worst movies in cinematic history." For something this bad, I can safely say that this is truly the "worst of the worst."Avoid watching Nukie at all costs, even just for fun. 95 minutes of your life that you're never gonna get back.

BTW the above rating is on a "it's so bad it's good" scale.I recently watched this movie after reading all the user comments about Nukie. Some of these writeups had me peeing in my pants I was laughing so hard...especially the one guy who said, "I hate God for allowing Nukie to be made". That sold it for me. Call it perverse curiosity, if you will...the same curiosity that drives one to watch such films as Faces of Death or I Spit on Your Grave.This movie is certainly atrocious, but I wouldn't say it's totally unwatchable. My friends and I regularly get together to have "Awesomely Bad Movie" viewings and make fun of them in Mystery Science Theater fashion. This one managed to keep the laughs rolling. I mean, a few people walked out of the room when the chimpanzee started talking, but that was perhaps the only lowpoint. The rest is just a pure mindnumbing, jawdropping, "what the f*ck?", knee-slapping good time.I would like to comment, though, how much Nukie was pissing me off. He did absolutely NOTHING to help anyone in this movie. He terrifies the villagers by possessing vehicles with his powers, knocks pots and pans all over the place, causes earthquakes. How about when that kid got bit by the snake? Nukie didn't do sh*t about it. Yeah, he put on a good fireworks show, though. Or when him and the kid are travelling by foot for days, and then finally he gets the bright idea to turn them both into balls of light so that they can travel faster. Or what about the very end when they're reunited and then they turn into balls of light and fly off. Why the f*ck didn't they do that in the beginning? I seriously wanted Nukie and his brother to die in this movie. They are such disgusting-looking creatures. That scene where Nukie goes over the waterfall I stood up really excited hoping that he'd get killed. He survived though. Damn.My one friend says, "This is absolutely the worst movie I've ever seen. This includes pornos". I want to force Rob Zombie to watch Nukie. I think it's the only thing that can possibly terrify him.

Without a doubt, bar none, unequivocally the worst film ever conceived by Man. Watching this film is an exercise in pure masochism. "Nukie" doesn't even have the "so bad it's good" charm of other horrible wastes of celluloid such as "Troll 2" or "Hobgoblins." The title character actually looks like a cross between a retarded bushbaby, a rotten potato, and a burlap sack full of horse manure. It's obvious that the creators of this film were envisioning an ET-like so-ugly-he's-cute character, with delusions of multi-million dollar licensing deals, lunchboxes and action figure lines. What they ended up with was a hideous monkey-faced monstrosity straight out of your worst Lovecraftian nightmare. This film is a horrible blight on the history of Mankind. It is pure torture and should not be viewed at any time by any human being whatsoever. I've made it my life's work to track down the unholy Sias Odendal, director of this film, and beat him senseless for his crimes against humanity. I blame "Nukie" for destroying my life and utterly shattering any hope that I may have had for the future of our civilization. Early on in the film, one of the "Space Foundation" scientists utters the line "This actually should not exist!" That is precisely how I feel about this film. I hate God for allowing this film to be made.In the immortal words of Tom Servo, "I'd slap this movie if I could."

Here's what I can say: this movie is SO BAD. NEVER UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES SEE THIS MOVIE. I try to see all the bad movies I can, and this tops them all. It's not even funny to mock, it's just that bad. It's a test of patience. Even if you think you wanna see this movie, you really don't. I'll leave you with a bit of the wit from this movie; while the scientists are taking miko's pulse with the x-ray machine, they still don't know whether he's an animal, mineral, or vegetable. Go back over that last sentence again. Yes. That actually does happen in the movie. Honestly, when I finally finished this movie I felt like dying(it took me a while because I watched about the first half hour and needed to stop on account of the utter idiocy of this movie). It is terrible. I can't stress that enough. And now I speak directly to the people who like watching bad movies: I know you've seen movie that people have told you not to see, but skip this one. It hurts to watch.