The Worst Film Ever

The film makes a home in your brain and the only cure is to see it again.

There are moments in this movie where the great movie it could've been peek out... They're fleeting, here, but they're worth savoring, and they happen often enough to make it worth your while.

The film may be flawed, but its message is not.

This was a good, but not great, action film made by Universal in 1936, about fighting the seal pirates off the coast of Alaska.As with other films by the #1 star of all time, it obviously has commercial value even today. The movie was re-issued to theaters in 1949. Oddly, virtually all Universal pictures from this era were reissued to theaters either by Realart Pictures or by Universal. "The Spoilers" is one example: reissued over-and-over to theaters, then by VHS, DVD, etc. But not "Sea Spiolers." "Sea Spoilers" was offered a few times in bootleg on eBay; not lately.Incidentally, Humphrey Bogart is being pushed right now as the #1 star of all time. Love Bogart, but #1 he is not.

John Wayne is Bob Randall, the best boatswain in the Coast Guard. His ship is heading home and he's looking forward to two things: he expects to be promoted to skipper of his ship, and he knows he'll see his girl Connie. Alas, things don't work out—at least not right away.First, the commander back in port passes over Bob and appoints his own son to command the ship. The Duke is disappointed but grits his teeth—he is too much the professional to let it affect his work. But second, Connie is kidnapped by a gang of seal smugglers and taken out to sea and who knows where. Can this be allowed to stand? Sea Spoilers does not exactly stretch the intellect, but it's fun, nevertheless.Nan Grey is spirited as Connie, the girlfriend. Her part is not large but she has a few good scenes—she directs some fiery speeches at the head bad guy (Russell Hicks), and she displays smarts when a swift escape becomes vitally necessary.Hicks is a particularly nasty baddie; suave in appearance and manner, he exults in the early success of his evil plans and freely insults his captives and enemies.Some minor subplots distract briefly, such as the young commander's fear of rough water, and the seal brought on board by the Duke's assistant and pal (Fuzzy Knight, as combination right hand man and comic relief). But it's really John Wayne's show: he plays a handsome, dutiful and daring young officer who's tall and strong and not a big talker. What's not to like?

Sea Spoilers finds John Wayne as the commanding officer of a Coast Guard Cutter on duty in the Pacific Northwest looking for seal poachers. This was the first of six films that Wayne did in 1936-1937 for Universal in an effort to broaden his acting horizons. Not one of these B films for Universal was a western.It gets real personal after Wayne's sweetheart, Nan Grey, witnesses the murder of a drunken playboy on his yacht. The playboy, Ernest Hilliard realizes he's been the dupe of these seal poachers for some time and threatens to spill to the authorities. The head of the outfit, Russell Hicks, has a thing for Grey and instead of just killing the only witness, kidnaps her and takes her to his Aleutian hideaway.In the meantime Wayne also has been superseded in command of his vessel by William Bakewell who is the son of the commanding officer George Irving. Believe it or not Bakewell has a phobia about water and wants to be in the air. He eventually gets his wish, but the villains capture him for his trouble.Sea Spoilers is a competently made action film and the final battle with the Coast Guard and the poachers is very well staged, especially considering this is a B film. Fuzzy Knight fulfills the role of sidekick, just as if this were a western. He and the Duke worked well together, a pity he didn't do any more films with Wayne other than Shepherd of the Hills.I have a hard time though wrapping my mind around the concept of a Coast Guardsman with a water phobia. It's explained, but how did Bakewell get in the service in the first place even with a father that had a lot of pull? And did Russell Hicks have that bad a thing for Nan Grey?Sea Spoilers could have used a better story. Still it's not a bad action film and some of the westerns the Duke was doing for Lone Star films were a whole lot worse at this time.

I believe this is the first Wayne film for Universal. As such, not bad for its type. Low budget hurts but it does move along well. Why aren't these older Wayne films run on television?