Simply Perfect

Just perfect...

Exactly the movie you think it is, but not the movie you want it to be.

An old-fashioned movie made with new-fashioned finesse.

Beautiful Bo Derek is a corporate magnate who travels to France to make a lot of bread on a lot of chocolate.While trying to acquire a confection factory which makes chocolates that look like little dog-dookies, Bo is romanced by Robert Hayes, an entrepreneur's 'man-friday' who wants to keep his servant identity a secret, lest he risk losing Bo's affections.The real star of this international tidbit is 'Gideon', an aristocratic greyhound who likes to ride around Paris in the back of a Rolls-Royce. He's the funniest - and apparently the most intelligent - character in the movie.'Hot Chocolate'? Not really, but that's a better title than 'Warm Dog-Dookies'.

This is a romantic comedy about a Texan business woman (BJ Cassidy - Bo Derek) who sets off to France to purchase a dying French Chocolate Truffles company for tax offset reasons.The owner and manager of the chocolate company is a moron "Count" frenchman with a sidekick jack-of-all-trades businessman (Eric - Robert Hays). The Count really is a moron, has no idea what he is doing and has no brain for business at all.So BJ comes to France and is pursued by Eric and a fling ensues... with confusion and side plots and hijinks.OK, so the basic plot outline sorta sounds OK-ish, but I tell you this film is boring and annoying.I think the entire dialogue was dubbed over as the lip-synching was off and the sound effects and dialogue sounding unnatural. The acting is atrocious and numerous plot elements do not make sense.For a high powered business woman managing a billion dollar company in cut-throat corporate America, BJ seems to find everything funny. Corporate fraud by the chocolate factory makes her giggle, getting her car run off the road makes her giggle, getting into a very corny fling with someone and getting lied to makes her just smile a bit less, when she should be upset.According to this film, when BJ smiles she is normal. When she shows her teeth she is happy. When she just has a smirk, she is bitterly angry. There is no acting here...Apparently all French people also speak English, even when talking to each other?? The supposed romantic scenes just left me bored stiff. So I actually paid some attention to the plot instead and was amazed by how stupid many plot twists are and how many things just don't make sense.BJ wants to buy a company for $8m without any due diligence process (all she says is "there's holes in the books"). BJ falls in love easily for a rich high-powered business woman (i.e. stupid) even when the hero doesn't even do much. Eric knows business so well, yet he doesn't actually help the count to fix the company. Eric is plainly American even though his family has been servants to the Count's family for generations (so why is he then not French also??).I didn't like any of the characters. French stereotyping (all passion and no brains and lazy), Bo Derek smiling at everyone, the hero of the film not actually doing very much, the script trying to be funny and failing badly and romantic scenes that are just boring.I'm sure Vince Cassel would prefer you didn't know he was in this film. He plays a moron thug... badly coz he's not given anything worthwhile to do.My sister bought this for me. I will notify her she has bad taste in films, coz she liked this.This is a girl who thought Braveheart was boring....In summary, the script is woefully unfunny and boring, plot holes and confusion aplenty, shocking acting, very corny and shallow.Avoid as the bad score above suggests. 2/10.

The Fox Movie Channel has a knack for unearthing forgotten movies that never made it, as part of the fare they offer their viewers. Case in point, "Hot Chocolate", a 1992 film that might not have had a commercial run, as it appears it went directly to video. It is no great loss, by the way, if no one ever saw it.This movie set in France seems to have been a vehicle for Bo Derek, a gorgeous creature, that in this project, seems totally miscast as B.J. Cassidy, the daughter of a wealthy Texan, who loves to invest in obscure companies as a way to avoid taxes. B.J. comes up with the idea of buying a chocolate factory that produces excellent truffles and fits right into the Cassidys plans. She has to go to inspect the place and falls in love with the factory owner's private driver.The film is predictable and doesn't have anything new to say. Perhaps with another leading lady "Hot Chocolate" would have turned out better. There is no chemistry between the stars, Robert Hays and Bo Derek. Ms. Derek's delivery is awkward, at times, and she gives a flat performance.

BJ (Bo Derek) is a rich Texas entrepreneur with an interest in investing abroad. Her sites are set on owning a small chocolate truffle factory in France. Jetting off to the candy-making town, BJ meets an attractive man, Eric (Robert Hays), at the French airport and spends the rest of the day with him. As it turns out, he is the chauffeur and confidante of the chocolate factory's owner but, he does not disclose this information to her. Will BJ be able to buy the factory and will she still be attracted to Eric when she learns the truth?This attempt to star the beautiful Derek in a romantic comedy is only partially successful. She is attractive and works well with Hays but she doesn't have the thespian skills to elevate the mediocre script. The two French actors who are cast as the factory owner and his estranged wife, however, are adorable and add much to the enjoyment of the viewer. The French setting, too, works to the film's advantage. Nevertheless, only serious fans of Miss Derek or of romantic comedies in general may be interested in a showing of this film.