Pretty Good

Fresh and Exciting

While it doesn't offer any answers, it both thrills and makes you think.

It's the kind of movie you'll want to see a second time with someone who hasn't seen it yet, to remember what it was like to watch it for the first time.

Nut case is murdering college students, can new teacher stop the madness?!Believe me, you won't care.With a title like Splatter University, one would immediately gather that this movie just isn't high art. But worse than that Splatter University doesn't even qualify for amusing garbage. Splatter U is so poorly made - the story is mindless, the characters are throw-aways, and the whole movie lacks any essence of imagination. Needless to say there is no suspense or atmosphere or scares. This drivel isn't even brave enough to throw in any nudity (for the cheapest thrill of all). So all around this endlessly flawed slasher offers nothing in the way of entertainment (not even cheap laughs) and just becomes a complete bore. Bottom of the barrel folks - even die hard slasher fans will want to think twice before viewing, let alone paying money for this flick.BOMB out of ****

Splatter University (1984)1/2 (out of 4)Incredibly awful slasher film has kids on a campus being slaughtered by a maniac with a large knife. The director of this went on to make the cult classic Class of Nuke 'Em High but no matter how you look at this thing it's still awful. The acting is among the worst I've ever seen, the story makes no sense and the death scenes are all very lame and fake looking. I went ahead and gave it half a star for some unintentional laughs that pop up from all the badness. This is certainly one of the worst slashers of the genre.

"Splatter University" is a watchable if not that spectacular entry in the genre.**SPOILERS**Arriving at a new campus, Julie Parker, (Forbes Riley) is told by Father Perkins, (Richard W. Haines) that the position is only available due to the previous occupant having died. Taking over the class, she meets up with students Mark Hammond, (Ric Randig) Cathy Hunter, (Kathy LaCommare) Cynthia, (Laura Gold) Tom Scavelli, (Ken Gerson) Wolf, (Sal Lumetta) Margaret, (Noel Stilphen) John, (John Elias Michalakis) and Tony, (George Seminara) who immediately try to make her life miserable because of her new position. When school gets out and they try to have a series of parties around campus, a maniacal killer begins to stalk around them, and after conducting some investigations into the murders, realize that the killer is a recently escaped mental patient from a nearby asylum is responsible, and together they try to stop his deadly rampage across the campus and student body.The Good News: This one here doesn't have a whole lot of positives, but there is some. One of the big points is that there's a lot of blood and gore, and even though it's all really cheap-looking and quite obviously fake, the fake that there's some brutal deaths is something to be admired. There's a lot of stabbing in here, with large amounts of blood forming around the wound which is always great. One is memorable being stabbed down in the privates on a close-up and a second one where the victim is stabbed and then found to be completely disemboweled in the restroom. It's one of the main values to be found in the film, and is certainly a big deal in the film. The drive-in sequence that occurs through the film is quite fun and surprising, with a lot of great parts to it that really make it somewhat entertaining. The other part that the film gets right is the segments at the end dealing with the stalker going after the remaining students in the school, leading to a strong series of stalking scenes that are quite fun. It's a big fact towards making this one somewhat entertaining, and is what gives the film most of it's good points.The Bad News: This one here doesn't have a whole lot of flaws, but there are a couple in here that do spring up. One of the main ones is that the beginning doesn't have a whole lot of good parts to keep it's interest going. This takes way too much time getting to the good parts of the film, mainly it's second half. The beginning mystery parts are way too drawn out, making them seem way dull than they really should be. There's also too much time spent on the group running wild after the class, and they're adventures aren't that great or interesting. It really makes the film's beginning feel really dull. Another big part of that is the incessantly long party scene, which here is one of the worst scenes of the film. It's long, dull and terribly uninteresting, offering up only a means to pad the film out and not really doing much of anything, as it's nearly impossible to hear anything in there due to the noise, what's there is of no consequence to the plot and there's a lot of time with nothing that happens in the scene. The other part that doesn't work is the series of plot inconsistencies that are hard to get over. The missing girl, who does so at the very beginning of the film, goes unnoticed for the majority of the film and no attempt is made to make it seem like there's anything done about it. There's also the failure to believe that the new teacher never heard of the previous murder, which is a little unlikely. Otherwise, this one here isn't all that great.The Final Verdict: Not that spectacular but still has enough good parts to it to make it watchable for the style, this one is really only there for the hardcore slasher fans. Check it out if a fan of those films, a shot-on-video fan or can tolerate cheesy films, but if that isn't appealing, it won't be a total loss to miss it.Rated R: Graphic Violence and Graphic Language

Nasty knife violence isn't enough to save this slasher mess. If you are a die hard slasher fan like me, you can't help but be seduced by a title like "Splatter University". Oh but what a total mess this is. Years ago I watched it with low, very low expectations but I didn't expect to be THAT bad.The plot is very well known and common for a slasher flick but a little more coherence and less useless conversations could've helped for the movie's pace. The editing is what ruins this movie completely because there's absolutely no sense in some important scenes. And the ending is a tear! Plot twists are not always effective people.The positive thing about this crapfest is the cheesy but nasty gore. Some might find this movie to be misogynistic but I guess most of the death scenes were justified, if you try to be objective about the ending.Watch "Splatter University" if you are hungry for slasher flicks. I believe I watched the cut version on late USA Network programming many years ago.