Touches You

The Worst Film Ever

A movie that not only functions as a solid scarefest but a razor-sharp satire.

By the time the dramatic fireworks start popping off, each one feels earned.

The idea is so great, let us gather some famous directors and let them do a short so we can compile it on a DVD. But sometimes you better watch out what you are doing, because i was looking forward to the second entry liking part 1 but after seen it I was left with a bitter feeling.For me the A en Z entry was by far the best. There are a few other ones that did deliver the gore and scare but most of the entries I asked myself, how did they ever got on this DVD. There's no gore or horror to catch. I have seen it before with the V/H/S franchise. Starting off above mediocre, part 2 being the best and part 3 sucks real hard. If you think you are going to sit and watch 2 hours of gore and horror then you are wrong. I don't mind the stop-motion shorts and done with clay, they are good but there's so much crap here that I hope part 3, which is announced already will pick up again the real horror. Maybe the Asian entries are above mediocre and do contain gore and full frontal, and A do deliver nudity and black humour, if all entries would have been done that way (or like Z) this would have been a gem but for know it's below mediocre.Gore 1,5/5 Nudity 1/5 Effects 3/5 Story 2,5/5 Comedy 0/5

Another collection of twenty-six horror shorts from twenty-six very different directors, The ABCs of Death 2 is, once again, an extremely mixed bag, in subject matter and in style. With such a varied range of work, it's likely there'll be something to intrigue most adventurous horror fans, but be prepared to wade through an awful lot of nonsense to get to the good stuff.A is for Amateur, directed by E.L. Katz, kicks off proceedings in fine form. This segment follows an accident prone hired killer who successfully carries out his latest hit, even if it doesn't happen quite how he had imagined. Expertly told, with an unexpected twist and a deliciously dark sense of humour, this was easily my favourite part of the whole film—a shame because that meant that everything that followed was a disappointment by comparison.The best of the rest:C is for Capital Punishment (directed by Julian Gilbey), which effectively highlights the potential failings of the death penalty and boasts a really brutal decapitation.G is for Grandad (Jim Hosking): seriously warped fun that sees a young man taunted by his grandfather, who just happens to have no penis!M is for Masticate, a stylish zombie short filmed almost entirely in slow-motion.V is for Vacation: a man regrets calling his girlfriend when his friend grabs the phone and shows her what they have really been up to while on vacation.W is for Wish: two boys wish themselves into the World of Zorb, the fantasy setting for a popular range of toys. It isn't as much fun as they expected.Z is for Zygote, which sees a woman delaying giving birth for 13 years, the child growing inside her until there is no more room. In order to create more space, the kid removes her mothers internal organs and bones. Nice 'n' grisly with a really twisted finish.The absolute dregs:H is for Headgame: director Bill Plympton delivers an animated short that looks like an excerpt from his 1988 film 'How To Kiss'. Yawn!L is for Legacy, directed by Lancelot Oduwa Imasuen: Nigerian movie-making at it's most amateurish.P is for P-P-P-P SCARY!: No… P is for P-P-P-P S**T!What was the point?:N is for Nexus: seriously, what was the point?What the hell was that all about?:Y is for Youth: seriously, what the hell was that all about?

A few of these films were pretty good. J, M, O, S,& V. They were creative, well written, or had a good twist. The rest were pretty meh. That's fine. I've seen enough short films. They're passion projects for aspiring film makers working to better their craft, and vent some creative juices. I can accept them well enough, appreciate the little nuggets of goodness that might shine through here and there, and appreciate the effort that went into making them, often a budget of little to nothing, as they made it in their free time."P-p-p-p is for Scary" was possibly the worst short film I've ever seen, and I've seen a lot. How this ever made its way into this collection leaves me with just one of two conclusions. A: Purely through nepotism or bribery, or P: because there was no other film submitted for "P". If it was the latter, I would've hoped they just left it out. There were definitely some other bad ones in this collection, but this won the top prize of worst by a mile.

An anthology horror film from 2014 featuring segments directed by the director who made the documentary 'Room 237', The Guy who was Howard Moon in 'The Mighty Boosh', The Director of 'Inside', The director of 'Manborg', The director of 'Splice', The director of 'Idiots and Angels', The Director of 'Stage Fright' the slasher film musical, The directors of 'Dead Hooker in a Trunk' and 'American Mary', and at one time the director of 'Suicide Club' was involved but sadly he dropped out at the last minute and tonight's movie is 'The ABCs of Death 2'A sequel to the first film this one is another 26-chapter anthology that showcases death in all its vicious wonder and brutal beauty.There's not going to be a run down I'm just gonna tell you the good segments, the Okay segments and the bad segments, I will say this the opening credits are amazing.Good: A- An assassin's Job doesn't quite go as planned B- An a TV show gets cut C- A Kangaroo Court has a mistrial D- I don't know what to say, 'Where the Dead go to Die' meets the works of Lee Hardcastle G- Surprising, funny, weird H- Its like getting to first base times a million I- 'Deadgirl' meets 'Evil Dead' J- Anti-religious segment M- At first its bad but once you get to the end its just awesome N- The Dangers of Trick r' Treating O- Cool look at the zombie genre, zombies putting humans on trial Q- Why you shouldn't take tests people randomly offer you R- A game of chance S- Home Invasion its that simple T- Porn shoot gone horribly wrong, U- What apple will ultimately do to the world W- Its like 'Manborg' but with more fantasy elements X- Why you don't give your kid's musical instruments Y- Easily the weirdest and funniest segment Z- reminds me of the ending to Miike's 'Gozu'Bad K- not really interesting or impressive P- annoying, uninteresting and stupidOkay E- People on an island with a funny ending F- Just a somewhat Ironic story, nothing fantastic L- Hard to describe, like a 50s monster movie V- A Hooker's RevengeNow as weird and fun as the first one this one is more logical I guess, with only one segment from Japan its more for an open audience than the first one but I think that's why I liked the first one its not for everyone it was gross and weird and crazy and gory as all hell. this one isn't as gory or weird but its still really good I'd suggest it to anyone who liked the first one or even hated the first one. The acting was pretty decent all around same with the writing which shifts from bad to good. Also the effects are all really good. on the gore meter from one to ten its a 7 the goriest segment s the last onein conclusion the best segments where A,C,D,I,J,N,O,Q,S,T,U,W,X,Y,Z 5/5 stars