Simply Perfect

Nice effects though.

It's entirely possible that sending the audience out feeling lousy was intentional

This is a coming of age storyline that you've seen in one form or another for decades. It takes a truly unique voice to make yet another one worth watching.

Delightful and funny! There's nothing very original in this comedy but that's what it makes it so pleasant to watch. It's a zombie movie with children and people who are not afraid of them... Teacher deserves indeed all of our respect! It's really great written and directed. There's some length that a great editing makes forget. If you want to have fun, you're in the right place with this movie.

Cooties is yet another in the crop of zombie comedy movies. Thing is I'm a sucker for them, and judged by the trailer this definitely looked to be one of the better ones. I was not disappointed. It opens up with a montage of chicken nuggets being made, from the killing of the chicken all the way to the first bite, except this time it's infected and is enough to put you off chicken nuggets for life. Then we get introduced to Clint, an aspiring writer who's moved back to his sleepy little town from New York and is about to start his first day as a teaching sub at the local primary school.I found myself thoroughly enjoying the movie already, before the zombie infection had even broken out. While no new ground is particularly broken with the cast of characters, they're all a delight to watch. Clint is a positive guy despite being down on his luck, Wade is your typical jock come PE teacher with assholish tendencies, Rebekkah is tightly wound and maybe a little fanatical, Tracy is obviously trying to conceal his blatant homosexuality, Doug has no idea how to interact with real people, and Lucy is...well she's cutesy I guess; smiley, happy, giggly. She comes more into her own later on. While none of these character tropes are particularly new, the way they interact with one another, and the chemistry shared between the whole group, lends to a number of hilarious icebreaker moments, like Rebekkah pointing to her rape alarm when Clint introduces himself, or Wade's inability to pronounce 'dual rear wheel'.Thankfully the humour never really lets up, as it oozes into every moment, making Cooties more comedy than horror. Even in more serious moments, there's jokes squeezed in to lighten the mood and keep the tone more amusing than disturbing. And yet, and most crucially, none of the jokes feel forced. Each one flows naturally from the characters and moments they find themselves in. Often they come completely from the left-field and are funny out of sheer surprise (such as Doug using "gloves" to sift through bodily fluids). It's also hugely quotable, which in my opinion is one of the most enduring aspects for a comedy, as it keeps the hilarity going long after the credits have rolled. I've found myself quoting it all day today, and I foresee it getting quoted more over the next few days. "Follow me, I do crossfit" and "You may have noticed I sometimes say the wrong rowboat" are particular highlights.As I said though, Cooties ends up being more of a comedy than a horror movie, so if you're looking to it for scares, you will be disappointed. Me, I'm a wimp, so I welcomed the toned down horror. Even when the opportunity arises for a cheap jump-scare, they play it slower and less dramatically. Negative for some, but it made it more enjoyable for me personally. This is a zombie movie though, so there is a certain level of gore. A couple of characters get their guts ripped out, and there's a lot of kids covered in blood, but in-all it's fairly light on the gore scale, especially for a zombie movie.The cast are all great. While the characters are tired tropes, each one is made more enjoyable thanks to the acting talent behind it. Elijah Wood is charming as Clint, who is a character who could so easily have drifted into annoyance. Rainn Wilson steals every scene as Wade, with Leigh Whannell's Doug not far behind (seriously, who knew Leigh Whannell was actually funny?). Alison Pill is perfect as the cutesy Lucy who comes into her own later on, and Jorge Garcia enjoys looking stoned and confused throughout most the run time.There is one rather large criticism I have of Cooties though and that's the end. Or lack thereof as the case may be. The survivors manage to escape and leave the town only to reach the next town and find the pandemic is far more reaching than they expected. There's a little hint of finding a cure, but they just blow up a playgym and hightail out of there into the credits, with no resolution to any of the barebones character arcs, or the general story. It just sort of ends, and it feels like they didn't really know how to resolve anything, so just threw up the credits when they reached their allotted runtime. Maybe it was deliberate to leave the door open for a sequel, but it made the whole thing feel a little incomplete, like there was more to come that we just didn't get to see.In conclusion, Cooties is, for once, a very good thing to have experienced. It's truly hilarious and best and mildly amusing at worst. It's a little light on the horror and gore, so not recommended for that crowd, but for anyone just looking to have a good chuckle I couldn't recommend it enough. I give Cooties a solid 8/10.

The best bit about Cooties is the title sequence as maggot infested chicken meat is processed and turned into chicken nuggets and consumed by a schoolgirl as school lunch.The only other bit the viewer might like depending on your mileage is schoolkids attacking and devouring the school teachers or alternatively teachers sadistically beating up the crazed infected kids.Elijah Wood has descended so much from his The Lord of the Rings days. He plays Clint a struggling author who has come back to live with his mom and substitutes as a teacher at the local school.At least he has a memorable first day as a mysterious virus grips the schoolkids turning them into blood crazed monsters as the teachers are trapped inside.Cooties is supposed to be a comedy horror but it is a poorly structured film, a lot of the action is in the dark in order to save on the budget. I found the teachers irritating and I was upset that the Wade character was not the first one to be ripped apart.

Personally, I believe the plot of this movie was exceptional. I love horror movies and the movie was pretty good.Until the ending, where they don't even solve the virus. They just drive off, leaving all these blood-hungry children on the loose. I mean, at least find a cure or something?Other than that, it was pretty good. I would recommend it to a horror fan.